About A Man
by Casteline
Summary: Part 1 in the Tales of a Wicked Witch. Willow is curious. Willow/Xander friendship. Mild Xander/Andrew slash.


_**Another 1am brain child.

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**_

**About a Man**

"Have you ever had a sexual dream about another guy?" Willow asked completely out of the blue for no reason what so ever. She and Xander were sitting at the kitchen counter eating ice cream out of the container, trying to escape the chattering of 15 hyper potentials in the other room.

"What?" Xander replied when his brain finally processed the question.

Willow shrugged. "I have no idea what's it's like to be a man. I mean, according to statistics, just about everyone has had a homoerotic dream once in their life. I know I have, you know, a lot, 'cause, well, gay. I'd ask Buffy, but talking to Buffy about anything, even apocalypse related tings, has been kinda hard lately. I figure, asking her about whether or not she's had dreams about other girls would just be awkward."

"'Cause asking me isn't?"

"Not really, no. So, have you?"

"Have I what?"

Willow rolled her eyes. He was so dense sometimes. "Had a sexual dream about a man."

"I don't know," he replied, not looking her in the eyes. "No."

"Liar," she accused.

He glared at her. "Fine, maybe I have. _Once_."

Willow grinned. "Who was it?"

"I am _so_ not answering that."

"Was it Spike?" she grinned. "It as Spike, wasn't it?"

"No!" he exclaimed. "It was no-" he started, rather loudly, then lowered his voice. "It was not Spike."

"Oh come on, if I was a straight man, I would totally be at least a little guy for Spike."

"You have no idea what it's like to be straight _or _a man!"

"So," she replied. "I know what it's like to be a gay woman and I'd still consider having sex with him. You now, if not for Buffy."

Xander pondered for a moment just how they're reached this conversation point.

"So, if not Spike, the who was it?" she asked. "Larry? Was it Larry? How hilarious would that be," she grinned to herself.

"You're making a really convincing argument for me to tell you, you know," Xander said sarcastically. "And no, it wasn't Larry?"

"Scott then?"

"Are you going to list off every gay man we know? Cause the list isn't all that long."

"Fine, Riley?" she asked. "He's got that cool secret agent thing going for him. Chicks dig that, right?"

"I'm not a chick!"

"Oh yeah."

"Are you telling me you actually forgot that I wasn't a woman?" Xander asked, outraged. Willow shrugged.

"So, not Riley?" she verified.

"Not Riley," he rolled his eyes.

"Okay, um… Angel?"

"No."

"That one douche Buffy dated that slept with her then left her?"

"Why are we listing off Buffy's exes now? And I never even really met the guy."

"Okay… Giles?"

"Oh ew."

"Well, you can never be sure," she said. "Turns out one of the potentials has a wicked obsession with older guys. Like _older_ guys."

"Please spare me. I don't need to know which one."

"Vi," Willow answered with a smirk. "So… was it… hmm… you know, I think I running out of guys we know."

"Believe it or not, I do know people that you don't."

"Are you saying you had a sexual fantasy about one of the guys on your construction crew?" She asked. "That's what I thought," she said when she saw the look on his face. "Who are we down to… Oh, was is Oz?"

"No."

"Jonathon?"

"No."

"Warren?"

"God no."

"Thank god for small mercies one that one. Andrew?"

There was no response.

"Oh my god, it was Andrew!" she squealed.

"Quiet!" he exclaimed, putting his hand over her mouth. "You tell anyone, and I swear I'll-"

"You'll what?" she replied, her eyebrow raised, skeptical that he could come up with anything to make her keep quiet. Not that she was planning on telling anyway.

"I'll… come up with something really horrible later."

She smiled, and opened her mouth to respond, by was interrupted by Rona.

"Hey," she said tiredly. "As entertaining as this conversation is, we're trying to sleep in the next room. Could you keep it down?" she asked, then walked away before receiving a response.

Xander glared at Willow, who just giggled.


End file.
